Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
