Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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