Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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