oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
My vagina just recognized that song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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