Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
hey, you wanna get together over coffee or something?
is this code for 'i just got broke up with and i need a sympathy dicking'?
how did you know?
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
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