haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
