Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Randomize
