covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
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