I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
and now her best friend is massaging my table under the leg. this may not end well.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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