i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
they had to hand cuff you because you wouldn't stop trying to unzip the paramedic's pants...this is why i love you
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Someone just walked into the bar with a pillow
I don't know whether to judge him or give him a high five
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
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