she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
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