Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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