please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
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