Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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