Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Randomize
