i think i have herpe
just one?
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
She bit a glass in half.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
We call it "Dishes: Hard Mode". Basically whoever is doing dishes gets head but needs to finish the dishes before they cum.
And so far nothing been broken!
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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