it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I found your pet lobster in the bathroom this morning. I went to return it to you but it escaped.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
