Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
