He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Randomize
