Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
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