I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Randomize
