It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
21 Embarrassing Stories From Adults Who’ve Crapped Their Pants
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
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I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
premonition: im going to wake up covered in mashed potatoes
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.