I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Randomize
