Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize