In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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