She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
