we're blogging at a bar
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
