If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
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You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
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when I woke up, he was drunk and singing "soft kitty" and petting my face
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
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