He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to leave early so she could get ready for her high school's homecoming. I hope her date likes sloppy seconds.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
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