I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
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