I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
