I like my sex mixed with concussions.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
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