Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
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i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
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You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
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