do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
Send help, water and tortillas.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
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