just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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