he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
This is what I get for listening to Christians.
Randomize
