Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
