That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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