he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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