Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I didn't have toilet paper until 20 minutes ago. But I have champagne. Priorities.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
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