I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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