this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
