The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
