I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Was it you who made out with a toothless guy last night?
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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