lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
