hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
It's like God shit irony all over that family
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
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