Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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