Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
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