Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
