Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
