he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Randomize
